This Week in Westeros: "Eastwatch" (Season 7, Episode 5)

WARNING: This Post is Dark and Full of SPOILERS

A.K.A. “The One Where Gendry Comes Back”

So wrapping up the cliffhanger from last week, Jaime doesn’t drown because Bronn saves him and drags both of them out of the water in the aftermath of the battle. How is Bronn able to lift Jaime – decked out in heavy armor – out of a lake while also swimming. Probably using the same plot-relevant powers that allow Varys to teleport between Dorne and Mereen in thirty seconds.

Also in the aftermath of the Battle of the Loot Train (doesn’t quite have the same medieval ring to it that other skirmishes in this show have), Daenerys gives the surviving Lannister soldiers a choice: bend the knee, or die. Randyll and Dickon Tarly aren’t going to cooperate, and so Drogon burns them alive. You know, for someone who’s saying she’s not her father and she’s not advocating murder, Daenerys sure is doing a lot of acting like her father and advocating murder. But, as Lord Randyll puts it before his death, “There are no easy choices in war.” Nevertheless, it’s interesting to see Dany accidentally following the same path as the Mad King right alongside Cersei, who is doing the same thing. Nice little parallels like that are why I love shows like this.

Up at Winterfell, Bran – using his freaking cool warging powers on a flock of ravens – sees the Night King and the army of the dead marching towards Eastwatch, and he sends out messages to Sam and Jon to warn them. Naturally, the maesters at Oldtown don’t believe this. Apparently a crippled boy seeing an army of mythical boogiemen through the eyes of bird is too ridiculous for men of science. But Sam, being one of the only people to encounter a White Walker and live (not to mention actually killing the icy son of a bitch), is sick of the maesters not wanting to do anything, so he takes some forbidden books, Gilly, and Sam Jr. and leaves the Citadel.

Oh, and Gilly casually reads a passage from a book that says Rhaegar Targaryen had his marriage annulled so that he could marry another. Sam (the stupid ass) cuts her off, but if the person Rhaegar married was his beloved Lyanna Stark, then that means that JON SNOW ISN’T A BASTARD. He is a legitimate son of a Targaryen and a Stark and has just as much – if not more – claim to the throne that Daenerys does. I swear to God, if this show continues to jerk me around with people not figuring out that Jon is a secret Targaryen, I’m gonna pop a blood vessel.

Over at Dragonstone, Jon receives Bran’s other message and takes it more seriously than the maesters. And so, a plan is formed: Tyrion will arrange a meeting with Cersei so that Jon and Daenerys can convince her of the true threat to Westeros. Jon will lead a party beyond the wall with Ser Jorah (who, by the way, is back working with Dany) and bring back a wight as proof to Cersei of the White Walker threat.

Also at Dragonstone, Jon has an encounter with Drogon, who takes a liking to the King in the North. Gee, that’s suspicious, I wonder why IT’S BECAUSE HE’S A TARGARYEN AND EVERYONE IS BLIND. See what I mean about the show jerking us around? My blood pressure rises every time someone gets close enough to learning the truth, and then they do a complete freaking U-turn back into obliviousness.

And here we see Kit Harrington's audition for Jurassic World 2.

So Ser Davos smuggles Tyrion into King’s Landing, and while Tyrion meets with Jaime to set up the meeting with Cersei, Davos meets up with a character we have not seen in a very long time: Gendry! For those of you who need a recap (and if you do, I do not blame you), Gendry was the blacksmith that Arya became friends with back in Season 2, who then was revealed to be a bastard of Robert Baratheon, and then wound up almost murdered by Melisandre for his king’s blood until Davos set him free. You probably most remember Gendry from all the memes about how he’s been rowing a boat to safety since Season 3. Davos actually makes a joke about this, and it’s one of the funniest nods to the GoT fandom I’ve seen in a while – possibly ever. Anyway, Gendry’s been making weapons for the Lannisters – including a sick warhammer like his father (that he uses on some overly curious guards) – and is all too giddy to join up with Jon in his cause.

After Jaime’s meeting with Tyrion, Cersei reveals to Jaime that she’s pregnant. Whether or not she’s telling the truth (since the witch’s prophecy stated she would only have three children) or if this is just a ploy to keep Jaime (who’s faith in his sister is already starting to waver) on her side has yet to be seen. Regardless, I’m predicting Cersei dead by the end of the season.

Gendry meets up with Jon at Dragonstone, and I never thought I’d want to see Jon Snow and Gendry interact, but I really like their chemistry. It’s like a version of the friendship between Robert and Ned back in Season 1, only a new generation.

Back at Winterfell, a wedge is starting to be driven between Arya and Sansa, as Arya thinks that the Lady of Winterfell is trying to usurp Jon’s position as leader of the North. This is definitely not helped by Littlefinger, who intentionally makes sure Arya sees him engaging in shady deeds with a few of the Northern lords, and basically leads her to finding an incriminating scroll written by Sansa, which apparently was the message Cersei forced her to write to Robb back in Season 1 pleading Robb to submit to Joffrey.

This right here is why I love Littlefinger. He’s sneaky, he’s slimy, and he knows how to play people. He’s using Arya’s own distrust to make her find false information to further drive her apart from her already rocky relationship with Sansa. He knows Arya is a dangerous force, and if she’s allowed to be allied with Sansa, it could be very bad for him. The crafty, snakelike way he weaves himself through this great game is why Lord Baelish remains one of my favorite characters to watch on the show.

I cannot wait to see him finally get his comeuppance and die a broken man.

However, I do see a snag in the plan involving using Sansa’s message. It was written by a much younger Sansa, and despite Arya still having mixed feeling about her sister, she can clearly see that she’s changed from the last time they saw each other. I mean, that was a while ago and Robb has been dead for some time. I don’t exactly see how Sansa trying to sink her own house six seasons ago would be relevant now, especially since the current plight is possible rebellion towards Jon’s leadership from the inside. It would just be opening up old wounds just for the sake of opening up old wounds. Maybe they’ll use the logic of “Sansa tried to sabotage a King in the North before so she’s trying this again” to justify Littlefinger’s plan, but even that seems like a bit of a stretch.

And there was much rejoicing.

And at Eastwatch-by-the-Sea, Jon assembles his crew to face the White Walkers: himself, Jorah Mormont, Gendry, Tormund Giantsbane, and the Hound and the rest of the Brotherhood Without Banners, who were being kept in the cells at Eastwatch. Despite their conflicts with one another (like how the Brotherhood sold Gendry to Melisandre and Jorah’s father hunting Tormund’s people), they are able to put aside their differences to fight as a living army against the dead.

And the episode just ends with them walking out into the snow. Admittedly, with an episode titled “Eastwatch”, I was expecting a big battle with the White Walkers like at Hardhome. But considering the season’s wrapping up in the next two episodes, I suppose that just means that next episode is going to be one big whopping battle.

I think the highlight of this episode is finally seeing Gendry return. After four seasons of letting this boat-rowing plot thread dangle, I’m really glad the show decided to revisit it before Westeros turns to absolute crap. They show off his fighting skills nicely, as well as his budding camaraderie with Jon, proving that he really is the second coming of Robert Baratheon. The good bits, anyway.

Littlefinger’s scheming is another highlight of the episode (despite some gaps in his logic), as are all of the foreshadowing to Jon’s true parentage coming to light. Varys has a nice scene with Tyrion after Dany burns the Tarlys, where he monologues about all the times he witnessed the same from the Mad King and tried to rationalize to himself that it was not his fault they were dying, despite Varys being the one who brought the traitors to the king. We still have no update on Yara’s situation with Euron (who has seemingly disappeared from the plot as quickly as he entered), but at least we finally got some more stuff with the Hound.

Overall, this was mainly an episode to move characters towards more important events, but we got some good revelations out of it, like Cersei’s possible pregnancy, Gendry’s return, and Gilly – the person who couldn’t even read a few seasons ago – uncovering one of the biggest secrets in Westeros completely by accident. But with that badass ending shot of Jon and his Suicide Squad heading out into certain doom, I’m super pumped for what’s to come.

The Magnificent Seven (2016)

Final verdict: 8/10.

So who else was expecting the episode to end with the snowstorm clearing away to reveal the army of wights standing right there outside of Eastwatch? Or was that just me?